Mexico thrashed El Salvador by a score of 5-0 on Sunday night to open their Gold Cup campaign. Chicharito scored each of the last three goals, with his final effort serving as something of a warning to the competition.
Well into injury time, Little Berba received a long pass and made a move towards goal that was abruptly ended when El Salvador defender Marvin Gonzalez pushed him down from behind. Though it looked like Chicharito may have been able to stay on his feet if he wanted to, a penalty was awarded. And since he has a flair for the dramatic, Chicharito decided to to chip in Mexico's fifth goal, causing goalkeeper Miguel Montes to dive seemingly before he even kicked it.
So, after one Gold Cup match, Chicharito has already notched three goals, putting him well on his way to his eventual total of eleventy billion.