Cesc Fabregas
I can't wait until I'm a Barca player. ... I'm going to wear my kit everywhere -- even in the shower. ... I'm going to get a turtle and name it Turtle Thiago and then I'm going to show it the real Thiago and laugh when he realizes they have the same name. ... I really hope the club that I am captain of doesn't screw this up for me. ... If they demand a lot of money for one of their most important players, that would just be unprofessional of them. ... I hope they sell me soon. If I have to go another month without Pique bleeding on me, I might die...
Renny Vega
I think...I think I'm stuck.
Sergio Romero
What's with Messi and Legos? ... Every time he talks about them, he giggles like a loon and then takes a nap. ... I tried to talk about good restaurants in Barcelona with him and he immediately turned the conversation to how great it would be if someone would make a working restaurant completely out of Lego blocks. ... Maybe I'm missing something. Maybe playing with Lego toys would help me relax and see the game with childlike wonder. ... Or maybe I'll just continue looking at adult websites on the internet. ... Yeah, I think I'll do that...
Tim Howard
Time for the disgraces. ... First, camouflage? Camouflage?! They're making me wear a camouflage kit this season like I'm going bear hunting instead of keeping clean sheets. ... What happens when Phil Jagielka turns around and just sees a mound of greenery instead of a goalkeeper? He'll probably have a panic attack and have to be put on medication that makes him sterile. ... This is just ridiculous. ... I bet someone who speaks Spanish designed this abomination. ... This is, without a shadow of a doubt, an absolute, total, obscuring f***ing disgrace...
Photo: Reuters, Getty
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