Saturday, January 8, 2011

Random musings of footballers before they fall asleep...

Carlos Tevez

So confused. ... Should I stay or should I go now? ... Should I stay or should I go now? ... If I go there will be trouble. ... And if I stay it will be double. ... I should make that a song. ... Why am I thinking in English when I can't even speak it? ... I really thought my snood would've tasted better than it does. ... New Year's resolution: To be more decisive. ... And to be less reliant on ridiculous neckwear... 

Gerard Houllier

This was a bad idea. ... A really, really bad idea. ... Almost as bad as the time I decided to try and crossbreed llamas with bobcats. ... That did not work at all. ... I knew I shouldn't have taken the Aston Villa job. ... I even had that dream where Martin O'Neill pushed me down a never-ending flight of stairs and laughed as I fell forever and then his head turned into a llama's head and sang the Sesame Street theme song. ... That was probably the 10th weirdest dream I had this year. ... New Year's resolution: To improve my golf game with all the free time I'm going to have in 2011. 

Alvaro Morata

F*** YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Didier Drogba

Time for the disgraces. ... First, I can't even remember the last time I scored a goal. That's a massive f***ing disgrace. ... Then, we finally lost to Arsenal after beating them five times in a row. That's a kind of overdue f***ing disgrace. ... Then, I told Kalou that my New Year's resolution was to stop calling things that upset me a "f***ing disgrace" and he laughed and said there's no way I can do that. That's a faithless f***ing disgrace. ... Then, I told Kitier Katba he should make losing weight his New Year's resolution and he scratched my ankle really hard. That was a painful f***ing disgrace. ... Then, there were those times those two bald referees who probably make fun of disabled kids cheated us out of the Champions League. That...that was a...

Photos: AP, Reuters

Sanaa Lathan Ana Beatriz Barros Maria Menounos Shakira Leslie Bibb

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